When it comes to the issue of making choices relating to marriage, there are several factors to consider. Apart from personal development, which is fundamental, you need to consider the One who ordained marriage and sees beyond your farthest imagination relating to who you'd marry and the journey of marriage. He must speak or guide you if you don't want to end up in regret.
There are several things that could speak when you want to make certain decisions in life. Your friends, parents or counselors could speak or some inaudible voices. These inaudible voices could influence your decision making if you rely on them alone. Many had followed this 'voices' and had regretted it while others were lucky to have escaped it. What are these things?
1. Body
The size of a woman's breast, her body shape (slim, chubby or robustness), her butt or beauty are things that some men could be attracted to. Having pictured the kind of lady they want, they'll begin to look for that type.
Some ladies on the other hand are carried away by his 6 packs figure, broad or hairy chest, deep voice or macho figure. All these were to be good if marriage were to be a battle field.
All these would fade when the pressure of life bounces on the body. See beyond the looks!
2. Money
Nobody wants to marry a pauper but it is good to marry a 'poor' man with a great vision and purpose than to marry a wealthy man who sees nothing beyond his wealth.
Marriage is like a building. It will collapse when it is founded on infinitesimal things such as wealth or body shape. There's no solid foundation other than God's approval and a partner who fears God. Get it right!
3. Feelings
I have tried to make people understand that love is more than feelings. Although you may need to have feelings for who you'd marry but it must not be the bedrock of your decision.
Feelingscannot stand the test of time. Your feelings cannot cope with the challenges, demands and responsibility of marriage. Feelings are temporal and would change when situation goes on the contrary. Don't build your lifelong commitment on feelings!
4. Being caring
When a man sees what he wants in a woman, even though she is not the right one for him, he would employ all strategies to make sure he gets her attention.
He make sure he cares for her, which he doesn't do for others around him so that he can get her to bed or marry her.
Brothers, the same also goes for women. When she sees your future, anointing and destiny; she would ensure she comes close. The 'anointed' food flask, uninvited visitation, aimless call and care are means of accomplishing her aim.
To what purpose do you think Delilah came for Samson? Beware of men/ladies with false care antics. Watch him/her closely, if he/she doesn't do that for his/her mother, father, brother, sister or friends; then you'll be a victim. Shine your eyes!
5. Love
Now, you'll tell me you're in love, but see, love alone is not enough to make a relationship successful. How?
Love without the fear of Godwill cheat on you, abuse or humiliate you; after which it will beg for forgiveness and still repeat it. When pressure, temptation and lust mounts on a love without the fear of God, be certain that such issue will occur. I am not saying you shouldn't consider love, but consider God's approval and the fear of God.
6. Pressure
Pressure is a force that is mounted upon an object against its choice. Do not allow pressure to push you into marriage.
That your mates are all married doesn't mean you will not marry. That your mates are married with kids doesn't mean they have given birth to your child. It is better to take your time to plan or prepare before marriage than to look for a means of getting out of marriage.
Age will mount its pressure, friends would tell you you're getting old, your mother would tell you she needs to back your baby, your father may tell you to prove your manliness; but do not succumb to these pressure when He hasn't said anything.
How will God speak? When will He speak?These you may ask!
God will speak when you have a relationship with Him. This is beyond going to church or attending service. It is a personal and intimate relationship with God which you observe daily as you'd eat every day. It starts with daily studying of His word and prayer, prompt obedience to His will and seeking the interest of His kingdom. When you have a relationship with Him and trust Him to be able to provide, He will instruct you (Psalm 32:8).
God will speak in His own time. Nobody can force or rush Him because He makes all things beautiful in its time. You may be ready and He is not ready but remember that, He is never too late if you don't give up. Had John the Baptist came before time, who do you think would have prepared Christ's way.
Beloved, don't let his/her body, pocket, monies, false care, love or pressure speak in place of God. All of these are not enough to fall back on when issues arise in future. It is better to have a good marital foundation than to mend a faulty one. Before you accept his proposal or consider her for marriage, has God said anything about it?
I know you have something to say about this article. Must you consider what God says before going to the altar? Share your opinions.
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