Every little girl dreams about being married. They fall in love with movies about handsome princes, and even have pretend weddings where they walk down the aisle and say 'I do'. The wedding industry is a multi-million dollar industry and traditionally it's women who are responsible for planning it.
But past the fairy tales and the wedding day there are a lot of things women need to know about their marriage. And I don't just mean the same old 'never go to bed angry' cliche's that everybody hears.
Husbands aren't always charming, dashing, debonair, etc. In fact, some of them would rather read books, work on cars or play video games rather than buying you roses or whisking you away to a romantic getaway. And that's not a bad thing. You fell in love with him for who he is. If you expected Prince Charming you may have to marry a cartoon because not many men ride horses and fight dragons.
2) Toothpaste won't destroy your marriage. One of the most common reasons women bring their husbands to counseling is for what I call 'the toothpaste tube'. They're mad because they've been married 'X' number of years and he still doesn't put the cap back on the toothpaste in the morning. Or he doesn't load the dishwasher right. Or he doesn't just see that the house needs to be vacuumed and pick up the vacuum and do it. Instead he waits for you to tell him it needs to be done. Whatever it is, you've begged and pleaded and even yelled and he still doesn't do it.
Barking at your partner because he doesn't put the cap back on the toothpaste just makes you look superficial. I've never heard of someone divorcing because he doesn't put the cap back on the toothpaste. When you look at it like that, it's a pretty sill reason to get a divorce, really. There's no gold pen in the universe declaring that he HAS to put the cap back on. Yes, it'd make him a better roommate but does it really affect your marriage that much? Some things really are worth letting go. This one (and things like it) aren't going to destroy your marriage.
3) It's not just about sex. Ever since you hit puberty you've been used to boys you don't even know staring at your chest. You've also been used to going on dates where all he wants is your body. But your husband is different. Yeah, he wants sex all the time. But it's not just about the sex. It's about you. Sex is a great way to connect with each other. And he really does want to connect with you.
If you find yourself not wanting to have sex with your husband, ask yourself why. There are lots of good reasons to be having sex on a regular basis. If you can't find one, it's time to do some soul searching. You deserve to have a good sex life, too. And if it's not happening then something needs to change.
But past the fairy tales and the wedding day there are a lot of things women need to know about their marriage. And I don't just mean the same old 'never go to bed angry' cliche's that everybody hears.
3 Things Every Woman Should Know About Her Marriage
1) It's a good thing that your husband doesn't act like Prince Charming. Every little girl grows up watching those fairy tale movies where a handsome prince whisks away the damsel in distress. He then takes her to his castle where he makes her his princess and they live happily ever after. Thinking about it now, you can't help but get butterflies in your stomach thinking about finding a guy like that. But your husband is not Prince Charming. In fact, expecting him to be Prince Charmin is objectifying him.Husbands aren't always charming, dashing, debonair, etc. In fact, some of them would rather read books, work on cars or play video games rather than buying you roses or whisking you away to a romantic getaway. And that's not a bad thing. You fell in love with him for who he is. If you expected Prince Charming you may have to marry a cartoon because not many men ride horses and fight dragons.
2) Toothpaste won't destroy your marriage. One of the most common reasons women bring their husbands to counseling is for what I call 'the toothpaste tube'. They're mad because they've been married 'X' number of years and he still doesn't put the cap back on the toothpaste in the morning. Or he doesn't load the dishwasher right. Or he doesn't just see that the house needs to be vacuumed and pick up the vacuum and do it. Instead he waits for you to tell him it needs to be done. Whatever it is, you've begged and pleaded and even yelled and he still doesn't do it.
Barking at your partner because he doesn't put the cap back on the toothpaste just makes you look superficial. I've never heard of someone divorcing because he doesn't put the cap back on the toothpaste. When you look at it like that, it's a pretty sill reason to get a divorce, really. There's no gold pen in the universe declaring that he HAS to put the cap back on. Yes, it'd make him a better roommate but does it really affect your marriage that much? Some things really are worth letting go. This one (and things like it) aren't going to destroy your marriage.
3) It's not just about sex. Ever since you hit puberty you've been used to boys you don't even know staring at your chest. You've also been used to going on dates where all he wants is your body. But your husband is different. Yeah, he wants sex all the time. But it's not just about the sex. It's about you. Sex is a great way to connect with each other. And he really does want to connect with you.
If you find yourself not wanting to have sex with your husband, ask yourself why. There are lots of good reasons to be having sex on a regular basis. If you can't find one, it's time to do some soul searching. You deserve to have a good sex life, too. And if it's not happening then something needs to change.
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